Wednesday, September 24, 2008

the past and now

i find it rather disturbing everytime i asked myself this question.
it is my good friend in college,Vin that made me realised this.
there's this one person in college who loves to taunt and mock me.
the weird and stupid thing is that person treats me very nicely whenever i am alone with her
but whenever we are in a large group she will never fail to do something on purpose to embarassed me
like calling me an asshole
seriously i wonder why..
not wondering why she is treating me this way
but wondering why am i still so calm and ignorant about it
if any of you knew me before this,
i have definitely BLAST her nicely and have most probaly started an ANTI-hER club

i myself wonder why i choose to turn a deaf ear?
i think is because last time i always have annabeth as the calm and selamba one
and now since we are separated i learnt to ignore this tiny petty lilttle matters
because i won't have anyone there to patch things up for me anymore

i don't know whether this is for the better or the worse..
i think from what i can see is the pros outweighing its cons

i am less bed tempered except towards min :p
i learnt to take control of my emotions
i leant that small tiny not important people in my life shall not play any role in my life
i learnt to accept people flaws more

although it might seeem that i have become weaker
let it be seem that way
as long as i get my peace and quiet
i couldn't care less

another incident was when the rotaract club in my college was recruiting new members
i was so afraid to register myself(am still not registered!)
i kept thinking about how i was betrayed by some of my really good friends due to politics in the club
i mean i keep thinking though the club has its good motives and goals but would i really wanna risk my friendships with my new friends?

then i think:
-why should i let go of the chance to start anew with new people and new surroundings just cause the old interact club BOD was so immature back then
-i was immature too back then i admit...maybe now i am ready to learn how to play my cards right with the politics
-why should i give away my chance to try out and be one of the facilitators for this upcoming interact conference this nov 21st i think..

i am not trying to dig up old wounds and find faults in others..all i'm saying is that the past and now cannot be mix is two separate things...

the past is the past

now is now

no matter how much you were hurt in the past you will eventually learnt how to pick up the pieces and be stronger

although i lost the opportunity to be a facilitator or even a member of the ATC rotaract club but what i learnt was a greater expense!

until then,
learn to move on from the past
the other side is always greener
there will always be better people in life you'll meet!
with love,
karlisyle lum


Hysteria said...

erm.. hehe i am just bored so just simply reading blogs.
i saw the part someone calling you arsehole, but i am not aware of it. it makes me feel like i don know that much about the class. but well actually i don care about the class.
its just weird that you don get my attention. i mean, i don really know that much about you, and i sometimes wonder are you in the same class as me.
owkay, whoever does that to you just not worth your time. he/she just terang terang humiliate you and betrayed the word 'friends'.
you don have to feel bad about it, cos i know you are not like wat the person mentioned. you are nice person, i wished i knew you better.