Thursday, June 26, 2008

new edited photos(it's been awhile!)

with love,
karlisyle lum

look what common law drove me into....

take a peak into my room in palm springs@Damansara

this where all of the bright ideas are generated..this is the place where it all happens when i am in K.L...







WELCOME IN...a view from the outside...my messy bed...spot a tiny pink FAIRY at the door handle?heartxx it so much
the place where all of my master pieces are done!my PINK swirly chair...*you just gotta love it right?*
the view of my pink curtain and the fan on a high chair!
my closet...sliding door!yupxx that's part of my clothes for now...dresses and long sleeves on the top while t-shirts and tops and pants and skirts on the below!*all pink hangers!*
yes my own personal loo in my room!it sucks cause i got an extra space to keep clean!

my BEDAZZLED baby lappy!
an upclose view of my baby lappy!a spider forming its web...cool huh?hehe
pasted on my door!a glimpse pf the person staying in the room!baby me to now!
i know my room's nothing much and not that intersting but i am still renovating it!my self renovation!having drill up a few more stuff!anyway i was just too bored to do my law assignment..common law anyone?i'll give u rm50 if anyone is interested in doing it for me!
with love,
karlisyle lum

Monday, June 23, 2008

nothing much left to say

i am practically not in the mood...
seriously i been frigging insulted by this drunken old indian man...
what the hell is wrong with him?
what is it about t-shirt and jeans that turn him on?

the only time i enjoy KL life is
*during the weekends when i get to be with minxx all day long!
* when i am having fun with my classmates in lectures
*when i got reunions and cathching up events with my old friends


things that i have done:
-watch the INcredible Hulk,Made of honour and Get Smart
-literature and law assignments
-photocopied my Law book


things i ought to do by this weekend:
-clean the house spotlessly clean!*mum's coming!*
-wait till thursday night where i can be in minxx arms again!
-go to KLCC for kinokuniya..*KLCC anyone?*
-watch KUNGFU PANDA and whatso ever movie that i'll like!try out TWIN SEATS!
-meet up with my SABS-ians especially ANNABETH LEE!
-Find nice yamcha spots to hangout at KL!





P.S i really miss my friends!i hope i'll get to fit in better!there's no1 for me to do heart-to-heart talks anymore!
p.s the seats at cineleisure are more comfortable than the TGV at 1u!


with love,
karlisyle lum


Friday, June 20, 2008

will he see past through that one deadly sin of mine?

don't you dare judge me after reading this...you will never understand why i chose to do it this way..i'm not going to say i didn't have a choice...i did but it just so happens i chose the wrong choice and now i am stuck with the guilt of it..i betrayed everyone's trust!if only i could turn back time,but let's not go there aitexx?don't try guessing what i did wrong or ask me...i just feel extremely guilty of it..ker said when we sin,God forgives us but what if keep repeating the same mistake?i know you guys have what in your mind d...but again i said it's not that simple!God just open back a clear path for me and please help minxx accept you!

p.s most of the SABS-IANS are busy doing last minutes beauty check ups for prom night!i am so jealous and frigging missing the feeling of going for such grand events!


with love,
karlisyle lum

caught in the between

i meant to copy again my rough answers into a nicer copy buy mum called and said that she'll help me with the answers so i have to wait again and delay it till tomorrrow..

okay..i admit...i lost my sense of KIASUNESS when i was in form4...i want it back so badly...cause it did me good academically although not so good socially...

i am caught in between!really i am...

i am beinG judge because of my GCE english or better known as 1119 paper...YES i got a frigging B...does that mean i am not good enough for LAW?

just cause maths,addmaths and accounts i got frigging a1's does that mean i'm cut out for aCCA?

i am back to square one!i am clueless about what i should study...haish..


someone just tear out my BRAINS and tell me what it's filled with more...LANGUAGE or maths?please...lift this burden off my shoulders..AAAAARGHHHHHHH

i got a month to decide!mum,ah yee,uncle benny,the accounts lecturer in my college said i'm more of a calculating person...as in a mathematical person...but i frigging got an a1 cause i was lucky?NO,it had to be those tutor from JU and Selvan!


now mum is asking me what i have set for to pursue in my heart...

but she did make a point when she asked me"since you planned to marry KONG already,how are you going to be able to find a job in KUANTAN with the law degree unless you open your own firm!"

1st,i really do intend to marry KONG if nothing stand in the way
2nd,i really don't intend to open my own firm...i just wanna work with companies or do family law!
3rd,i don't have any relatives who are lawyers
4th,yes Kong will most probally return Kuantan to work at his family's company*being the only son*


aaaarghhh...tear it right in the middle will ya?please just do me a favor or seeing me suffer like this favors you?


i have people come telling me,i am so sure you are the LAWYER material...on the other hand,people tell me...no no...language is so not yours...do accounting!ish...people split me to half will ya?

this is how i really feel...i wanna do LAW but my future is at RISK if i do it because there are too many lawyers and i don't have family relations in the field!so i then look at ACCA...i mean ju makes it seems easy but that's HER...always the BRANIAC and the smart one...she's the one able to score 100 or was it 98 in mathemathics at school but not me...my highest so far was 93% and that paper was easy shit!

so HOW?i know just get married and open my own small business lar!asked daddy to invest for me...open my own boutique!why isit that part of me regret not taking form6?at least then i can still decide right?

p.s the only reason all the questions started circulating in my brains again is because i am frigging struggling with english literature!


look how my mood can be change so fast!tremendous effect after my mum decided to tell me that i should know that my cousin broke up with her boyfriend because she found out there's so much more to life after living in u.s and it's too young to be tied down!she's 21 after all going through the peak phase of her life..i know that i should have fun in my life now!believe me i have times for friends now!i mean that's her right?i know i am friggin 18 and i'm kinda tied down...it's scary to me too but no one ever said that it's impossible for two people in love being together forever right?

my confessions for today:
i'm scared to love him
i'm scared to leave him
i'm scared to lose him
i'm scared that i will screw up my future
i'm scared that i will do something wrong and stupid
i'm so scared to have the thought that someday this may end between us
i'm so scared of failing in style again!enough of b's and c's,,,i want a's!
i'm scared that i have lost myself!
i'm scared that i'll be judge for all the sins that i have done in the past!
i'm scared to be so close to him
i'm scared to be hurt
i'm scared to trust him completely
i'm so scared that i am going to burst into tears any second!


i need a BREAK!i need my friends!i need their hugs and care!i really need to be showered with love and care!i'm really so scared!funny isn't it a girl that has never been afraid to be herself has so much to fear for...

with love,
karlisyle lum

in love much?

sometimes i wonder why am i always so in love...isn't obvious enough to see that i am in love....why love that is something so beautiful can hurt this much?



when i am in love,
-i can be such a BITCh
-i can be such a PITA(pain in the ass)
-i can be such a BRAT
-i can be such an ASSHOLE
-i can be so CRAZY
-i can be so CAREFREE
-i can be so HAPPY
-i can be so SAD
- i can be MYSELF over and over again
-i can be so BOASTFUL
-i can be a BABY again
-i can be so IMMATURE
-i can be so LONELY
-i can be so NOT me

what is it about LOVE that has this special encounters and drive that is able to bring out that person hidden in me...that supress me...


i am not going to deny it...i'm just ranting on this post about how much i love my B...i miss him dearly!btw,HAPPY BELATED 13 moths ANNIVERSARY b!


i think i know this feeling...it is not like others...i know for sure this time...he is the one for me...you know the one where you spend the rest of your life looking for?i am sure that mine has came early...i love him like no other i have loved...

i feel the the whole brightens when he looks at me
i feel so secure everytime he has me in his arms
i feel like a baby whenever i in his cuddle
i feel like never letting him go at the end of the day



i secretly wish that he is next to me every night to hold me in his arms to sleep
i secretly wish that the time will stop when we are together
i secretly wish of being married to him now so that we can be together all the time
i secretly wish that nothing in this world will take him away from me


i don't know how to describe this feeling
iT'S love..
I KNOW it's love
one minute i love him to every bits...
the other minute he drives me crazy
but at the end of the day i know that is still love him



i hope the LORD will bless this relationship of mine...i know i have done lots of sinful acts in my life b ut LORD,who never does mistakes right?i hope that you will keep open doors for me and welcome me again!


KONG SZE MIN,he's the one that i love and cherish...he completed the puzzle in my life...i LOVE you always and forever!

p.s i don't mean to be boastful okay?i still love my friends though sometimes it doesn't seem that way!i know i can be a biatch right?but it doesn't matter because i still remeber every single memory i have with you guys!
p.s2 i want to take the oppotunity to apologise to my dearest friends for ditching you guys for those times i chose LOVE over you!

to:ANNABETH LEE
KERRYN LUM
SEE JU VIN
TI LE-JUNE
CAROLINE
SELVAN
AND ALSO TO THE REST OF YOU WHO HAVE BEEN A VICTIM OF MY DITCHING!I REALLY DIDN'T MEAN IT BUT IT'S JUST THAT IT'S ME...that's how i work...anyway it was my LOST for those Lost times i could have had with you guys!


with love,
karlisyle lum

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

let the pictures talk
































me with MAMA...minxx grandma!
threesome!the best combination when i am at his place!
me and minxx!
close up pic of the soon to be happily ever after! just seeing pictures of us reminds me he is near to me no matter how far we are!so don't mind me!



one word

there's only one frigging way to describe K.L life...HECTIC!!!!!!!I seriously thought that since it is just the first week i don't have to stress out but i was so wrong..thank God i have quite a number of friends in college already to help me pass time in college easier...well let's hope this will last and there are no two-faced asses in my life already!



well i had classes till 10.45a.m only today...to what contrast my b is having at TOC...he finishes class at 10p.m or later everyday!this is because my "rajin" b want to take an extra subject!ish...B,i seriously miss you so much!i went shopping with my kerryn!


*mum just called me and ask bout college!sudden lost of inspiration to blog!*


WILL continue next time!have 3 assignments awaiting me!silly english lit and law assignments!darn tension!ish...


with love,
karlisyle lum

Monday, June 16, 2008

don't feel like it anymore

why do i have this weird longing feeling in me?i had planned earlier on updating on my weekends activities with loads pictures too but i am just simply too restless to do so...




i feel this empty feeling in me...
just waiting to be filled
the emptiness makes me feel so depress
it is like an opression..
why is it supressing the happiness i use to have in me?
why do i feel like my whole world has black out?
why am i being drag into this deep hole where i do not belong?



i really had an okay time in college today...oh ya...today was the first day of college...i was actually looking forward to orientation but too bad...the lecturers told us that they will not force us to do small kids stuff like standing up and introduction stuff so we did the adult way...shake hands and get to know each other...thank God each one of us was brave enough...we even went to lunch together though it was raning dogs and cats...overall today the first day was great...besides the fact that i am slightly tension about what how many subjects should i take and choose...

the worst part of the day is having to wait for the darn bus!!!!!and waking up at 6 am just to get my ass to college before 9.30am...


NO!!!!!!!!!the worst of all is i don't get to see my minxx when i have finish coll!i miss him so much...i really miss you b!!!!!can't wait till this weekend again!

p.s i watch THE INCREDIBLE HULK d...it was so sweet!nice movie and worth it!
p.s2i am still missing my minxx...how do i get rid of this loneliness?
p.s3i got frigging english literatre homework...aaarh...help please?
p.s4 i will be updating on minxx cousin sis wedding soon enough!
last p.s...can't wait till wednesday night!!!!!!!!i don't have classes on thursday and friday!super yey!!!

with love,
karlisyle lum

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

back at one

let me begin with the pictures doing the talking first!my new fringe!*it doesn't really look that different actually!hehe*




just typing the title made me sang the song back at one by....erm lupa d ler...hahahaxx...anyway i just got back from kuala lumpur...K.L as in the heart of malaysia...finally back in damansara area!less jam and crowd!hurmxx...i went to my college to get the timetable...damn syok...only have 3 days of classes intil july 14th ny!then they will change and i'lll have 6hours of every subject in a week!aaarrgh...oh ya i met jennifer at ATC...she's also studying a-levels there!but march intake...what a small worls huh?coincidence is what its called...






i had a frigging horrible and rough time yesterday with kong's sis...one of them only..the other 2 already learnt to accept me and has stop all harassment but this one particular sis of his...got no words to describe how much i dislike her!she made me cried 3 frigging times!why oh why am i being tested like this?




oh ya besides having the syokness of 3days of classes only,i was totally bumped when i knew that i'll be having my assesment 2 from nov10 -nov 15!BUMMER!i'm suppose to be going langkawi on june14...minnxx is going and so is my whole family!aaargh...BUMMER!TOTAL BUMMER!let's all pray hard and cross our fingers and hope that my assesment 2 date will be brought forward!




i'm not really loving life in kl..made up my mine...i wanna go back Kuantan and work if i graduate!hopefully nothing will stop me from striking for the best!




the last thing is...i friggin FRIGGING miss my b!!!!!!!!!!!!!!he has two days of induction a.k.a orientation...so he is away at bandar utama@damansara while i am in kota damnsara!i miss him so much...how on earth am i gonna face this loneliness when i start coll on mon?i'll be only seeing him on weekends starting next week...huhuhuxx...




got a hectic weekend i'm kinda looking forward to actually but let's all pray that minxx sis will give me peace and not war!aaargh!!!!on friday night i'll be going subang for junexx party*hope it jadi lah!*the saturday whole day will be helping at minxx cousin's preparation for wedding then night go wedding dinner!then sunday r&r before college starts!






anyway i'm pretty sure that it won't suck that much with minxx around with me!just hope that minxx family members do not give me a hard time!aargh...




p.s beffie where are you?i'm really lonely...no one to talk to d!anyway if u still merajuk i'm sorry aitexx...
with love,
karlisyle lum

my undiscovered deadly sins (credits to juvin!)

Greed:High
Gluttony:Medium
Wrath:High
Sloth:Medium
Envy:Medium
Lust:Medium
Pride:High

Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz





with love,
karlisyle lum

Sunday, June 8, 2008

?

did i really lose you guys?why it seems that when i try to make it up,i get worst treatment?i'm sopory if i haven't tried harder to keep in touch but why be angry with me without knowing the pain that i am being put through?

where am i?

i seriously haven't been myself lately...really...it is the truth...i mean first i am unusually quiet...so quiet that i think i'm starting to get use to akward moments...u see i for one am a person who is totally against akward moments...second i'm being more careless that ever...if u know me good enough...i am close to what they call a" perfectionist"...





the first incident that proves my carelessness:

i was registering myself at ATC last friday...the day before ms Leong called me to remind me to bring my photostated ic and RESULTS and also two pasport pics...so i pack everything last minute on thurs...before we left SENTRAL and hop into a monorel to MAHARAJALELA,minxx ask me twice!u really sure everything is brought with u...i lazily ans casually said YESssssss...then when i reach ATC she ask me for my RESULTS...i fratically search through all my files and BOOM...it was not there...thank God ms Leong was understanding enough to have approve my scholarship andgiven me time until m y free class day on june 13 to pass to her...thank you miss Leong!





the 2nd incident is definitely a RARE one because it really was shocking...

we went and eat at the famous EATERY shop called nasi kandar KAYU...i don't know what happen to me..first i ask the waiter silly questions about the napkins there...then when i left the shop,minxx was like i can't believe u ask him that!hahahhaxx...okie the worst part...when i was in the car...about 20 minutes gone from the shop already,my mumxx handphone started to ring...my mum ask me...eh,why you call me KARLISYLE...u accidentally press isit?so i search through my handbag for my phone...and guess what?these words started pouring out from my mouth,"i left my phone in the shop!!!!!!!!!"of course first no one really believed because i was never this careless...i barely make this stupid mistakes in my life...then mumxx hp rang again and it was one of the indian workers telling my m um that i left my hp...so we went back all the way there...the guys ask us plenty of questions first about the hp to prove that is mine...of course he did tease me a lil but all in all...i am SUPPER GLAD to have met such an HONEST worker...i mean i think he was MAMAK?or indian...i tak tau lar tapi yang i tahu...HE is really an HONSET person and i give him my countless thank yous!







okiexx...i really have not been myselfd lately...i been really moody,quiet,super negative and the main one is FRIENDLESS!Looks to me what i have blog earlier last time is just falling into picture...but i tell myself everyday to be strong and pick up pieces of me that is lecft and carry on living...i mean i if they can't appreciate it why should i right?i really hope that i'll get some new friends at college!i can't always make minxx teman me only kan?haish./..so selfish...i'm just so F*** up!!!!!!!aaargh!!!!!







signing off with love,

karlisyle lum

Thursday, June 5, 2008

no time

these days:

i feel so suffocated
i feel so friendless
i feel so selfish
i feel so tired of life
i feel so confused
i feel so full of responsibility
i feel so fragile
i feel so grumpy
i feel so worried
i feel like breakin down
i feel like something is wrong





i miss my bestie friend ANNABETH LEE so much!i miss sharing secrets with u!
i miss my JU VIN the one that was always with me most of the time in class!i miss those 5sc2 times we had!
i miss my twin sister KERRYN for always trying hard to get time with me!those lame jokes of her!
i miss CAROLINE bullying me and pujuking me every time when i merajuk!
i miss LE-JUNE long nags that always do me good and those catfights we use to have!
i miss AIMIlaughter and enththusiam in learning and trying new stuff like make up and dressing up!
i miss SARMILA..my partner to be CRAZY with
i miss SELVAN...the idiot that annoys the hell out of me...the one i love to love and hate
i miss tuition times with my friends esp with miss phua*we SABS-IANS love her much kan?*
i miss those stupid bitch fights!
i miss those childish times!
i miss my BENGGONGS though i have change to BONGOK!
i miss those times we were busy getting ready for a big grand event
i miss those KIASU times
i miss those ponteng times
i miss eating AUNTIE'S junkfood*ju,selvan remember tak?fruits and apollo?
i miss GOH YEE YIN...miss those coutless times she back me up
i miss those time being called SHORTY..*dinish definitely remember this well enough*
i miss the INTERact conference times







GOD...i miss practically EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!why did i not appreciate them until i have lost the chance to experience it?



with love,
karlisyle lum

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

TAGGED by HUI FERN

HEY people...i won't be on9-in so frequent this two weeks...am busy with my life*getting ready for college and stuff!hehehxx...so here's goes the tag!


8 things I'm passionate about:
*MY bb minxx!
*TELEVISION
*Music
*movies with my minxx
*LOve*i just can't stand not loving and being not loved*
*Learning*no harm in getting more knowledge
*sugary food especially chocs and sweets
*PINK!!!!!




8 things I say or do too often:
-damn or darn in every sentence
-what the hell
-oh my GOd
-nibble my nails when i'm under stress
-break down when someone yells at me rudely
-stone
-think too much
-swear alot when i'm agitated


8 things i've read recently:
*KDU nat ATC 's a-level fee payment
*DELL promotions!
*newspaper
*magazines(hot,cleo,17,teen vogue)
*this blog of mine!
*books rented from K.L
*numbers
*the looks on my minxx face in the morning!




8 songs i could listen over and over again:
-the goodnight songs minxx crap to put me to sleep!
-when you're gone by avril lavigne
-came to my rescue by hillsongs
-bu de bu ai
-kiss goodbye by wang leehom
-take a bow by rihanna
-TATU songs
-mostly christian songs!!!!!!




8 things I learned last year:
-ScIENCE STREAM is so NOT for me!!!!
-to trust myself more
-to hurt and love
-to be myself at all cause
-to be less bad tempered
-working in an accounting office is boring!
-to be patient in a LDR!
-to learn in a hard way!
-no more last mi nute studying!!!!!


8 people to tag:
-don't feel like tagging anyone but do it if u want!